


Shepard and Kaidan

by Enchantedtalisman



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Alternate Reality, Fluff, Future Fic, M/M, One Shot Collection, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-14
Updated: 2016-02-14
Packaged: 2018-01-19 08:18:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 6,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1462300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Enchantedtalisman/pseuds/Enchantedtalisman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Drabbles and short fic about Kaidan and Shepard. Mostly Fluff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lost

**Author's Note:**

> So, because I'm anal about keeping things separate and have my brand of weird-what can and can't go together, I've separated my Kaidan/Shepard and Shepard/Steve fic. 
> 
> These are much fewer than my Shepard/Steve fics just because my Renegade playthrough I fell hard for Steve. (Ugh and the ending). And I still haven't finished my Kaidan/Shepard playthrough...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They're Lost.

“We're not lost.” Kaidan growls, and turns the shuttle to the left to avoid incoming traffic.

Shepard holds onto the seat and suddenly understands why Liara won't let him drive anymore. He leans into the next turn and presses his shoulder against Kaidan's.

Kaidan relaxes minutely before scowling at him, “I know what your doing, Shepard.”

“Hmm?” The soldier glances up from the Citadel lake. Shepard is pretty sure they are no where near the earth restaurant they were supposed to be at twenty minutes ago.

“Your trying to calm me down. I'm not angry.” Kaidan swerves again, and it's a pretty close call.

Shepard wraps a hand around Kaidan's arm. “I'm right here, and your here. That's all I need Kaidan.”

They slow down, barely, but it's enough that at least Shepard's heart isn't halfway up his throat.

“I just wanted a good dinner where we weren't interrupted by anyone. I figured we could try this new place that opened up.” Kaidan lowers the shuttle and lands perfectly a few yards away from the the public Citadel Park. “And we're twenty minutes late to our reservations. And I should have asked Edi for the directions, but I figured I knew the way, and I obviously don't.”

Shepard can't help the smile, because of course Kaidan wanted to do everything on his own, and slides his hand down until he's holding Kaidan's hand, rubs a thumb against his knuckles. “I'm just glad to be here with you. Wherever we are.”

The lights are just bright enough to show Kaidan's blush, and the way he bites his lip. “Shepard.”

“Kaidan.”

Kaidan presses a warm kiss against Shepard's hand. “I'm glad I'm here with you too.” His voice stutters as it always does whenever he remembers the Reapers, the Citadel, and the long weeks Shepard was in the hospital.

Shepard holds his hand a little tighter, and kisses him until the shudders leave Kaidan's body and they're lips are flushed and Kaidan's smiling.

 


	2. Letters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Letters between Kaidan and Shepard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wished there had been more letters between Kaidan-Shepard in ME2.

Kaidan gets the first letter after Horizon. He doesn't open it for ten days before the fact that Shepard is _alive_ and out there, even if he might be brain-washed, makes him click it open on his omni-tool and move away from his team so they can't read it.

_I'm sorry_.

That's it, the whole message. Kaidan doesn't know if he's disappointed or pissed off. He bites his lip and before he can calm down he opens the dictation on his omni-tool.

“Fuck you, Fuck you Shepard. I waited-” He takes a deep breath and barely stops the tears. “You—Two years!” He hisses and glances back at his team, but they're resting and eating—relaxed after the last mission and not interested in what he's doing. “Two years where I grieved for you. I wished you were here every day. Every day. I tried to move on. I—You owe me more than a sorry.” He stares at the message—the omni tool showing a written version of his dictation and he's going to delete it because now that the angers gone he knows why Shepard did it, and it wasn't Shepard's fault. Not even Shepard's fault that he fell in love with the idiot, much less that Shepard never did more than hint at the idea.

Someone bumps into him, wraps an arm around his shoulder—and he bumps the omni-tool, and quickly closes it down. “Hey, man come on we were bad asses. We kicked those geth to the fucking stratosphere.”

“Right.” Kaidan tries a smile and it must pass inspection because his teammate takes him back to their table and plops down beside him.

 

_Message Waiting_.

Kaidan's confused at first, stares at the message before realizing that he sent the angry-pissed off and bad idea message. He immediately feels guilty and bangs his palm against his forehead. “Fucking idiot, Kaidan.”

It's right there, and he's tempted to delete the message, leave it as it is, and go to bed. But just like last time he clicks it anyway.

_I died Kaidan! What do you want from me? I was dead. And then Ce—Then I learned that you all moved on, what was I supposed to do? Say “Hey I'm alive, want to get together now that we're not chasing Saren across the galaxy?” Just. I missed you every day. I know that doesn't mean much, but if we could—I care for—I'm sorry._

Kaidan rubs his forehead, his heart aches painfully and for a second he's sure it's a physical pain. Shepard wants exactly what Kaidan does, and if he wasn't such a wimp he would message back agreeing that whatever Shepard wanted—but he's with _Cerberus_ now. It makes his gut clench and he's not strong enough to look at why. He closes the message and leans back onto his bed.

 

_I know. I was angry. I didn't mean_ _to send that message_ _. It's just—you mean a lot to me Shepard. But your with Cerberus now._

 

_This is important, they're giving me the resources to deal with the Collectors. Please, Kaidan_.

 

_Is it worth it?_

 

_Losing you again? The Selfish side of me wants to say_ No _. I don't want to lose you again. But if it saves the world from the Reapers, then, yes._

 

Kaidan frowns at the message and digs his boot against the wall beside his bed. He knows that—that message right there, is all Shepard. Obviously no matter what Cerberus did they couldn't remove how good the man ~~was~~ is.

 

_I'm waiting on the Citadel_.  


	3. Shooting Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their anniversary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I totally thought I posted this ages ago, apparently I did not. So here this is, super late. Hope you guys like. I still adore Kaidan/M!Shepard but sometimes I just cannot write anything so, yeah.

 

Shepard knows Kaidan's got a surprise for him, though the biotic won't give any hints of what that surprise is.

Nothing will make him talk, not even bribing him with chocolate from Earth. Kaidan also looks more nervous by the time they're finally in the last part of trip.

The ship slows down, and Shepard feels Kaidan's hand on his.

“Let's go, Shepard. It's almost time.” Kaidan is smiling, but it looks a little weak, his hand tight and sweaty around Shepard's.

Shepard smiles back, because the man's beautiful even when he's being quiet and won't tell his plans about their anniversary (because Shepard will never forget that day).

They walk through the ships halls, reminiscent of twenty first and twentieth century tourist ships, but with a wide ballroom ( _“Impractical”_ , Garrus had said when Shepard had sent pictures) and large steel arches across the walls. Except this time when they entered the steel arches had split down the middle revealing glass with a heavy kinetic barrier and several dozen shooting stars streaming across the solar system.

“Amazing.” Shepard whispers, moving closer, and grinning. In all his years in space he's never had quite this luxury to watch the stars.

“I had hoped you would like it.” Kaidan flushes, and smiles, “There's more coming. This solar system has this event every fifty years. But every century it has a few more shooting stars then normal.”

More flew across, shining bright and sharp across space. They kept pacing by, a crowd forming around the window.

Shepard leaned against Kaidan and kissed his cheek. “Your amazing.”

Kaidan grunted, “Shut it Shepard.”

“You are.” Shepard kisses him again, slow felt warm as their lips brushed and it deepened into soft heat, “I love you, Kaidan.”

“I love you too, Shepard.”


	4. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaidan and Shepard find a home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is, holy hell, it's like ancient. I probably started this when my friend first convinced me to get Mass Effect. I editted it a bit, and yeah, here you go. Hope you gals/guys enjoy.

The first thing they do is rent a beach house away from people and the city's traffic, but close enough to a bar that makes steak sandwiches (at least they do when Shepard convinces the owner that it should be on the menu).

Kaidan is beautiful on a ship but when he's calm, and relaxed he looks less _worn_ , less like the world is on his shoulders. (Shepard finds it only a little funny that everything was on _his_ shoulders a few months ago)

It's quiet though, and it makes their skin itch, so if Liara sends a few possible pirate reports and the Normandy is nearby, well; they may or may not go out and deal with them before returning to their house and breathing a little easier.

The crew, or the rest of it at least, visit often. It makes Shepard smile seeing them alive and healthy, of course the house always needs a few repairs after their visits, but even though Kaidan complains every time; he never mentions that the visits have to stop.

Kaidan's family visits once, and it's one awkward dinner before Mr. Alenko mentions Shepard's assault rifle (emptied of ammo and thermal clips) placed on the wall and they get into a gritty discussion about which model is the best (Shepard prefers the Mattock, but Mr. Alenko scuffs and claims the old _Banshee_ was the best). Around the time desert is ready Kaidan is smiling and rolling his eyes at Shepard, but it's a good look on him; soft and inviting. Shepard brushes his foot against Kaidan's.

Kaidan grins and flushes.

The Alenkos stay for a week, and though Shepard is sure he's going to fuck up somehow they don't call him out for not being good enough for Kaidan (he isn't) or being too quiet (war does that) or staring too long at Kaidan (he doesn't want to ever lose him).

Mrs. Alenko is harder to crack then Mr. Alenko. She's sharp witted, and a bit fond of pie, but otherwise it takes him half the week for Shepard to figure out a way to make her crack. Ironically it's when Shepard is holding a photo album of his first date with Kaidan that she sees it and breaks into happy babble about how _adorable_ they are.

It's frightening how quickly she hugs him and treats him like a son after that.

 


	5. Last Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One more dance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, another old drabble. I could swear I wrote more Kaidan/Shepard than this. I think I have one more then that's all of them. Once I have the money I'm probably going to replay Mass Effect on my xbox and woo Kaidan and Cortez again. I love them so much.

The party's slowing down, and Shepard's still sore from the last battle against the Reapers, but he tugs Kaidan up from their seat and for once Glyph remembers an instruction without making it painfully obvious that Shepard asked him to do something; and plays low music that Shepard is pretty sure fits the mood.

Kaidan raises a brow, and looks a little flustered, but takes Shepard hand and leads. He's good at it, which is very apparent when Shepard steps on Kaidan's foot ten seconds into the dance.

The others, thankfully, are either passed out, still drinking, or in the other room playing poker.

“I'm glad you're alive.” Shepard kisses Kaidan's ear, cheek, and the side of his mouth.

Kaidan smiles, and presses closer until there's no space between their bodies. “I should be telling you that.” He kisses Shepard back slowly, licks against his bottom lip and lets go. “You scared the crap out of me, Shepard.”

Shepard wants to make a joke, but he had seen Kaidan's face when they had found him, and the heavy fear and despair, the tears. Well, he never wants to see it again. He presses his forehead against Kaidan's. “I'm sorry.”

The other man chuckles, sniffs audibly, and buries his face against Shepard's neck. Kaidan mouths at Shepard, licks, and nips until there's a flushed heat running through Shepard.

Shepard wants and he can feel their arousal prominently against eachother's hips, but they don't do more than lean against eachother, trading kisses and trying to dance, and he only realizes later that Kaidan was mouthing _I love you_ over and over again across his neck.

 


	6. Jogging

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jogging.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was in the mood for some Kaidan/Shepard earlier this week, or last week, my memory is faulty and I wrote this. I think fluff is my main way of feeling a little better haha.

 Jogging is soothing to Kaidan, he doesn't get much battle on earth, not when you're a retired soldier.

It's even better when Shepard is with him, who smiles at him, and stops him every five minutes for kisses.

They don't get a lot of consistent running on those days but it's _good_ , and honestly Kaidan will take all the kisses and sly looks and jokes over running any day.

Shepard will sometimes lead Kaidan away from their loop around the neighborhood and take his hand, warm and calloused, towards one of the nearby bakeries.

Kaidan loves every moment with Shepard but it's when Shepard wants to do something with _him_ , Kaidan, who was told that he was boring and too strict or to by the rules for years. Where girls and boys would stay away from him; after killing his instructor with biotics came out.

Sometimes when they're eating Shepard will grab Kaidan's hand and not let go until they're done eating (sometimes Kaidan thinks they specifically go to bakeries so they can eat one-handed).

 

 

Other days Kaidan jogs alone, Shepard still works with the Alliance (like they would lose their icon after the Reaper War), and he feels a little colder, a little less. It's one of those days today. His leg muscles are aching because he's been running for about an hour an a half now and has left the neighborhood behind about ten minutes into his run.

Just as he rests against a building, one of the older dinners that came back around 2130 to reconnect with humans _old roots_ , he gets a message on his omnitool.

Kaidan pops it open as he breathes deep, and there on his screen is a message and picture of Shepard smiling and Shepard's voice says; “So bored without you. Next time I'm bringing you with me.”

Kaidan flushes and ducks his head, connecting the message to his dormant earbuds (some days he likes listening to music on his runs), and listens to it a couple of times. He still can't fathom someone wanting him this much.

With his heart beating a little fast, because even if they've been together two years sometimes it strikes him how in love he is with this man he says, “I'd like that too, miss you.” The omnitool snaps a picture of him and he's going to delete it because he looks gross and they've only been away from eachother for a day and a half; _it's too much_ , but his sweaty fingers slide across the screen and it hits send. He bites his lip and is just about to request a deletion when a new mail pops up.

 _Miss you too. You look good_.

Kaidan blushes and chuckles. He doesn't know how long he stares at the message before another beep and this time it's a picture of Shepard grinning at the camera. _Love you_ , Kaidan thinks with a smile on his face.

 


	7. Picture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard can't sleep sometimes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So [otpprompts](http://www.otpprompts.tumblr.com) has a collection of fluffy prompts and I tend to look through them when I'm run dry, found one about Pictures (should have saved the link or the prompt) and wrote this when I was feeling kind of down.

Sometimes Shepard can't sleep. It was often even after the Elysium War, but now after Eden Prime, and Virmire (almost losing Ash and Kaidan), and the Citadel battle it's far worse.

Those nights he'll watch vids or go through reports, or really anything to keep his mind occupied.

Shepard can't say when it happens, perhaps around the time Kaidan is comfortable enough to actually take off his omnitool in their quarters, but one day he picks it up and out of whimsical amusement changes Kaidan's background picture to the latest awful game (called _Space Asari Detective)_ with an Asari in a full battlesuit and a Krogan in a skimpy outfit.

Kaidan realizes what happens relatively quickly but he just rolls his eyes and changes it back.

Every once in a while, it just happens that Shepard grabs Kaidan's omni-tool and does it again and again.

The most memorable is when he changes it to a picture of him dancing and that is a mistake because Kaidan keeps that one for a month before changing it. (Shepard admits he's not the best dancer but he doesn't think the picture is _that_ funny)

It's been about three months when once again he can't sleep (this time it's the flash backs to the Collector ship almost killing them all, and how he and Joker narrowly escaped), and he picks up Kaidan's omni-tool.

The screen opens to a picture of Kaidan and Shepard kissing eachother on the Citadel balcony. Shepard remembers that, when the crew had gone to see Anderson in his new appointment as Councilor, and he smiles and runs his fingers over the image. He glances at Kaidan who's still asleep on the other side of the bed, and closes the Omni-tool.

Changing the picture can wait a little longer.

Shepard isn't sure but he thinks Kaidan smiles at him the next day when he opens up his omni-tool.

 


	8. Held

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Held.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another prompt I found on otpprompts. Actually really enjoyed writing this one.

 Kaidan slips on the ice of Thelem; one of the new colonies that the Council has made so a majority of the citizens are a mixture of various races. He feels his heart jump.

Shepard catches his arm and lifts him until Kaidan is in his arms.

“Shepard, what are you doing?” Kaidan's glad for the save but this seems a little excessive.

There's a snicker from behind them.

Kaidan can just see Ashley covering her mouth behind them and he glares at her.

“You slipped, I'll carry you.” Shepard smiles at Kaidan.

Kaidan scowls and tries to climb out of Shepard's arms, “Shepard this is not necessary.”

Of course that only makes Shepard tighten his hold. “We're on vacation, I don't want you getting hurt.”

“Then why don't you carry Ashley?” Kaidan grumbles, giving up on trying to get out of Shepard's hold. This is one of the few times where Kaidan wished Miranda hadn't augmented Shepard with mechanical parts.

Shepard glances at Ashley.

Ashley snorts and waves her arms, “No, you are not carrying us both around this town.”

“She can handle herself.” Shepard grin doesn't fade quickly enough that Kaidan doesn't see it.

“Liar.” Kaidan growls, but Shepard ignores him.

They keep exploring the town and every once in a while Kaidan really does try to escape Shepards arms but it's no use.

Shepard's arms around him, are actually kind of soothing, if Kaidan is honest with himself. Warm and strong and it's a little enjoyable having Shepard carry him around town (Kaidan shakes his head after he thinks that thought).

There are a few different shops the trio has never heard of and they enter them but quickly realize the first is a Krogan bar (at least a dozen blood stains on the walls), the second is an Asari mind melding...place ( _What do you call Asari mind-sex exactly?_ Kaidan wonders), and the third is a Salarian restaurant that smells lovely.

Ashley takes the orders after the host kicks Shepard out for refusing to let Kaidan down.

They stand there in the cold and Shepard smiles down at Kaidan, “You finally relaxed, are you actually enjoying this, Mr. Alenko?”

“Shut up, you wouldn't let me go.” Kaidan flushes, face feeling hot against the frigid wind blowing past.

Shepard kisses Kaidan's lips, “I'll never let you go.”

Sappy, after the war they're both a little sappy, and Kaidan pulls Shepard into another kiss, “I won't let you go either...and maybe it has been a little enjoyable.”

Ashley starts laughing, and Kaidan glares at her (he can't believe he missed hearing her come back). She's holding onto her sides and raises a hand, when she finally recovers she takes a deep breath and grins at them, “I'm glad you two have eachother. You two are adorable.”

Kaidan groans and presses his face against Shepard's neck.

Shepard yelps at the cold, but he damn well deserves it Kaidan decides.

 


	9. Say Sol

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pictures, quite a few of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another prompt inspired me to write this, and since yesterday night was awful I thought I'd treat myself by posting this.

The team is halfway across the galaxy, in a new sector of planets that are being considered for colonization.

They just defeated an animal that looks about the size of a horse but with a scorpion stinger on it's tail.

Shepard armor is scratched but thankfully the air on this planet is breathable and there's nothing that will effect him in the atmosphere. Except he's feeling incredibly….odd, not _high_ exactly but happy and a little care free. (He can't stop grinning.)

“You really should get back on the ship.” Kaidan says.

But Shepard just scuffs and pulls Kaidan towards the cliff that is surrounded by a range of mountains.

“Shepard.” Kaidan pulls him back.

Shepard rolls his eyes and pulls Kaidan into a half hug, grinning at the rest of his team. “Team photo-op come on.”

Liara raises her brow, but her lips are twitching.

Gairus, good man—Turian, immediately gets on Kaidan's other side. He's grinning too.

Tali and Liara quickly follow while Wrex and Ashley look like they're walking away.

It only takes a gentle _pull_ from Shepard to send them sliding in front of Shepard and Kaidan.

“ _Shepard_.” Wrex growls. “I will kill you.”

“I'll help.” Ashley scowls.

Shepard ignores them and sends out the VI from his omnitool. “Say Sol!” He yells.

There's a loud _snap_ and the pictures taken.

Everyone but Wrex and Ashley are grinning.

It's about that moment when Shepard passes out from the poison and Kaidan barely catches him before he topples off the cliff.

 

 

Shepard barely remembers the first picture but he figures it's nice to keep mementos of their travels and every once in a while he'll cajole whoever's on his team at the moment to take one.

Though he regrets asking Grunt where they should when the young Krogan chooses a lava pool and Miranda and Jack almost topple into it (he decides then that he's never letting them on his team together ever again).

At least Kaidan looks amused, and well Shepard likes his smile.

 

 

Wrex takes the picture this time, it's probably fitting since it's a bar fight on Omega, and they're dealing with a bunch of Krogan who said something about Wrex's clutch being the weakest in several centuries. (He hadn't liked that)

Somehow Shepard comes out of the fight with only a few broken fingers and a bruised lip.

Ashley is rolling her neck and groaning, “Think I fucked up my shoulder.”

Wrex grins, there is blood on his teeth, and pulls Shepard and Ashley against him and snaps a picture.

 

 

Tali thinks it will be funny, and Shepard isn't sure but lets it go, the picture of them on the Council's pedestal from where they speak sounds like a good way to get back at the Council for all the times they didn't listen.

Vega doesn't get it, since most of the pictures were taken before he had shown to the group, but obliges and sits down next to Tali.

Cortez (who this whole tour of the Citadel is for) sits gingerly next to Vega.

“Say Sol.” Tali grins, and snaps the picture.

The council isn't so happy when that one is _somehow_ posted on the extranet.

 

 

Joker does _not_ find the humor in Shepard bringing him and Edi to take a picture next to the broken restaurant where; “I ALMOST DIED SHEPARD!”

Shepard rubs his ear and sighs, “Will you never let that go?”

“No!” Joker scowls and crosses his arms.

“Come on, for old times sake.” Shepard gently wraps an arm around Joker and turns on the VI.

“He did save the universe, Joker.” Edi says.

Joker glares at her but sighs and says, “Well since you saved the universe, with an incredible pilot getting you through all that shit, I guess one picture is something you deserve. But you owe me so much for almost getting me killed.”

“I'll buy you a better meal.” Shepard says.

Edi snorts and quickly comes up to wrap an arm around Shepard's waist. “I am sure Joker is quite overreacting, the bullets were no were near his brain mass.”

“Two inches away!” Joker yells.

Shepard quickly says, “Say Sol!”

“Sol!” Edi readily says.

 _Snap_.

Joker scowls at Shepard's omni-tool, “Retake, I look awful in that one.”

“There are no retakes, Joker.” Shepard says.

 

 

They're back on earth, a quick pit stop to clean up the Normandy; since the Alliance is still very protective of it.

Miranda left the instant _Alliance_ was mentioned, but Shepard is sure they'll see her again. She says it's a curse.

It's a sunset by the time Joker lands, and it's utterly _beautiful_. Sure there are various stars circling the planets they visit, but sometimes Shepard misses seeing his home planet's sun and the way it glows and turns a deep orange and makes the sky alight with red and purple clouds.

Once the Admirals know they're back, and the necessarily ordeals for the day are done Shepard pulls Kaidan, Ashley, and Jack (Joker and Edi are suspiciously missing and Grunt is at a bar no doubt) in front of the Normandy.

“Really Shepard?” Jack scowls.

“It'll be a good memory, come on.” Shepard smiles at her.

Jack sighs and covers her face, “I hate you.”

“Join the club.” Ashley mutters, but she's smiling.

Kaidan leans against Shepard and wraps an arm around his waist. “Make this quick I need a bath with planet-side water.”

Shepard sighs, “You guys ruin the moments.” But he quickly turns on his VI and it readies to snap a photo of them.

The sun is behind them brilliant and giving the Normandy a high sheen.

Just as Shepard presses click on his Omni-tool, Kaidan pulls him close and kisses him hard.

 _Snap_.

Shepard pulls away, licking his lips, and smiles at Kaidan.

Kaidan grins back a light flush on his cheeks.

“Should have grabbed Ashley if I knew this was going to be a romantic picture.” Jack sighs and crosses her arms, “I'm going to get some grub.”

“I uh-” Ashley stares at Jack.

Shepard grins and nudges her, “Let's join her.”

Ashley flushes a deep red, “I don't—I mean, if you don't mind?”

Jack raises her brow, “Wow what pansy got into your pants? Act like yourself asshole that's why I was interested.”

Ashley growls and punches Jacks shoulder. “I'll show you asshole.”

Jack smirks, “Now that's what I'm talking about Princess, come on, I'll pay this time.”

Kaidan raises his brows at their retreating backs, “Did you just set up Ashley and Jack?”

“Yeah, huh.” Shepard smiles and grabs Kaidan's hand, “We need to see this.”

Kaidan narrows his eyes, “And take a photo?”

“Yeah, maybe.” Shepard grins.

 


	10. Cute App

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thinking of you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Totally another prompt from otpprompts. Don't normally post two stories in a day but I'm feeling awful and I really like this one shot.

 It's a silly app to their omni-tools. Shepard downloads it when Kaidan is dealing with his own Spectre mission (They are still trying to convince the Council to put them on a team but the Council loves _not_ listening).

The format is like those old messaging apps that he used to see on his grandmother's old cellphone, before Omni-tools, and it's simple to get used too.

No, what makes Shepard blush and smile is when Kaidan must press the _thinking_ _of yo_ _u_ button because a message pops up with a little cloud that says those words. He quickly taps his own screen but Garrus is asking where they're going next and he focuses back on the Galaxy map.

Back and forth they send _thinking about you's_. Shepard will admit that he's even done it in the middle of battle. (Laira _rolls_ her eyes at him.) Specifically when he is lifted up into the air and thrown, it reminds him of Kaidan and Shepard's spars, and Kaidan doesn't need to _know_ the specifics, but Shepard is thinking about him.

They meet shortly after, the app stops being used, both working through another mission together.

Ashley, Tali, and Vega are all glad to be back on the Normandy with the others.

Shepard sometimes whispers _thinking about you_ in a hushed whisper.

Kaidan flushes and smiles, but can't seem to meet Shepard's eyes whenever those words are spoken.

A date itself is impossible because once that mission is done Shepard is sent into another mission alone this time, and Kaidan is expected at the Alliance so they part ways again.

Shepard notices the thumbs kiss later, perhaps three days into the new mission and idly presses it.

A second later his thumb-print appears on his omnitool screen, and then a few minutes later a new thumb-print (Kaidan's) appears. The screen glows red and Shepard grins.

The messenger blinks with a new message _thinking of you._

He may fall asleep staring at the messenger with their thumb prints next to eachother.

 

Two weeks into their mission and Shepard has almost lost three fingers to a Krogan who tried to _eat his hand_ and is in the medbay recovering from several broken ribs.

Ashley took pictures an hour ago.

So it's with little surprise that he gets a message on his omni-tool.

It's that app again, but this time there's a drawing of a face (Kaidan?) yelling at someone in bed (Shepard no doubt).

Shepard huffs a laugh which makes him wince, with all the medigel being pumped into specific parts of his chest he has no pain killers and it _hurts_ to laugh. He painstakingly draws a stickfigure on his knees with his hands clasped _Sorry_ he writes shakily next to the head.

 _Fucking worried me Shepard. This is why we can't be_ _separated_ _I need to save you from doing stupid shit._ Kaidan replies.

Shepard snorts, and draws an angry face _I don't do stupid shit_.

 _Collectors, Reapers, Prothean beacon._ Kaidan lists off.

Shepard grumbles but can't help typing back _If I remember someone walked up to the beacon_.

_I don't know what you're talking about. Get better soon. I'll be on the Normandy once Joker docks on earth._

Then; _Thinking of you_.

Shepard smiles and presses his thumb against his omni-tool screen.

Moments later another thumb lights up the screen and it turns bright red around the two thumb prints.

_Kaidan, I'm always thinking of you._


	11. Trouble Sleeping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sleeping Trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trouble sleeping tonight so...posting this seems appropriate.

Shepard can't sleep. His aim has been getting rusty. Even Liara has remarked on it and she isn't quite the trained killer that he is.

The dreams are effecting him.

Constant dreams about death and failing his team.

Sometimes they're regular nightmares that unsettle just enough to leave him aching and feeling like he hasn't slept (Noveria is the normal one for that).

Other times?

Other times he sees a rachni's leg cut through Kaidan's stomach.

Ashley dying in a blaze of a nuclear blast. (Even though he knows she made it out alive, they all did...somehow)

Wrex being shot by Kaidan or Ashley.

Rarely is it Kaidan turning into a husk and Shepard...has to...shoot him.

Shepard can't think of those thoughts, but they come over and over again. So loud, it's hard to think, he can't remember the time nor date sometimes. He loses track. He's not sure when he decides to slip into Kaidan's quarters (the man refuses to sleep in the same bed while they're on missions), and take a jacket that's lying on the bed.

It smells like Kaidan, and Shepard barely reaches his quarters before his eyelids shut and he trails over to his bed; falling asleep and hitting the bed with a light _thump_.

 

 

One of the best nights of sleep he's had ever since they took this long mission.

Shepard wakes with his nose pressed against Kaidan's jacket. He smiles into it. Kaidan is the best thing that's happened to him in a long time (not including his team, of course).

 

 

Except the jacket stops smelling like Kaidan and the nightmares slowly come back.

It's ridiculous, Shepard can get away with taking one jacket but how is he supposed to explain it just appearing in Kaidan's room and another disappearing?

Shepard is sure the man will notice. He struggles through the nightmares at first, washes the jacket and carefully places it in the back of his wardrobe.

 

 

A week into the end of their mission ( a person of interest on one of the terminus planets) and Shepard is laying down to rest after he almost snapped at _Edi_ of all people.

There...on his bed. A jacket.

Shepard circles the room but no one's there, and he knows Kaidan is in the cafeteria having a late meal. He grabs the jacket, checks it, before sniffing it.

It smells like Kaidan.

Shepard flushes but holds onto it tight. It's silly, this is _silly_ but Kaidan must have noticed...and he didn't react negatively. He feels something at the edge of the jacket, a piece of paper;

_I'm sorry if I knew it was for nightmares I would have agreed. Leave the door unlocked if you want me to stay with you tonight. Until then sleep tight with the--_

A scrawl of pen and Shepard can just imagine the flush on Kaidan's cheeks before he stops writing _with the jacket_. He holds the jacket a little closer, unlocks the door, and gets back onto his bed.

For now the jacket will do.

 

A warm body presses against Shepard and he sniffs before wrapping an arm around—Kaidan.

“Shh, sorry I didn't mean to wake you.” Kaidan presses a soft kiss against Shepard's cheek. “I'm sorry.”

Shepard pats Kaidan's side, he understands, no one would say it but there's always the fear of someone pointing out Kaidan being the favorite. (No, he _is_ the favorite no matter how much Shepard denies it, but he refuses to treat him as such, at least because Kaidan wouldn't like that).

Kaidan kisses his cheek again and rests on the bed.

Shepard almost regrets the months that they didn't have this. Almost, but they have it now and that's far more important to him. He presses his nose against Kaidan's chest and breathes.

 

 


	12. Couch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god I just realized how many of these are about sleep. I need to stop writing sleep-fic. Another short one I wrote around august/september when I was cranking out a lot of short stories. This month and last month were both pretty dry, which is driving me crazy, but hey at least I can post some of the stuff I've written in past months.

 

Ashley demands they watch the movie and so Shepard agrees with a little smile. If anything, after the war, Ashley has been right near Shepard as if she still feels guilty for both her and Kaidan questioning him over Cerberus for so long. (He tried telling both of them it's alright but he's not sure if they believe him).

Kaidan looks up from the couch and gently throws the remote to Ashley, “Put it on, we can watch it before it gets too late.”

Ashley grins and flops down onto the couch, long hair swaying. Her house is next door and if it wasn't for the fact that the Alliance Central Base is nearby Shepard would suspect that she and Kaidan planned the move there on purpose.

(Even Liara owns a Condo, (that their Krogans, Quarian, Salarian, Drell, and Turian teammates seems to use frequently) a little farther away, and Shepard _knows_ that was planned).

It only takes a moment to make popcorn and pull out a couple of sodas for them. Shepard sets it all down infront of the couch and sits inbetween Ashley and Kaidan.

“You'll love it, it's so good.” Ashley grins again and presses play.

Shepard grins, he's glad they're still friends after all they've been through.

The Movie starts with a _bang_.

 

 

Shepard should move, they're both going to regret sleeping on the couch but Kaidan has fallen asleep sprawled on him and it's actually comfortable.

Kaidan is like a furnace, warm and naked skin making pleasure run down Shepard's own naked chest and legs.

The movie is done by now, a film from 2100 before they were born but Ashley swore by it. There's just a dimly lit screen keeping the living room lit. Ashely no doubt had left the house and was by now probably sleeping in her own bed.

Shepard shifts his arm and wraps it around Kaidan and presses his lips against Kaidan's forehead.

Kaidan is beautiful, eyes closed, face relaxed and mouth pressed against against Shepard's neck. He shifts against Shepard and rubs his nose against Shepard's shoulder before sighing.

Shepard closes his eyes and drifts for a while, their legs rub against eachother (Kaidan moves in his sleep) and he doesn't think he'll fall asleep just yet but Kaidan pressed against him is soothing, and Shepard strokes his hand against Kaidan's back. “Love you.” He whispers against Kaidan's forehead. _Always_.


	13. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaidan hurts, at first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So apparently when I'm single on valentines day I write weird angst/fluff. Came to me when I was taking a shower.
> 
> Little rough around the edges because I just wrote it today.
> 
> Happy V day <3

At first everyone hurts and they offer condolences, careful words, and offer their time and presence.

Kaidan admits that he hurts too, at first.

Then flashes of light appear just above his eye. (The fact that his eye isn't fully organic anymore and can access files as if he's using his omnitool is a little eerie) But after several visits to Doctor Chakwas with nothing but “it's not hurting your eye at least”, he gets back to his quarters on earth, and the light flashes again and Shepard image appears.

“Close.” Kaidan mutters, forgets that he doesn't have to voice the command, but the memory doesn't close. He frowns and a mixture of salt-water and lubricant slides from his eye. “Dammit.”

“Kaidan? Kaidan I've missed you.” The Shepard says.

It's a cruel trick his mind is playing on him, he closes his eyes but the image is still there, brighter and more solid.

“Kaidan? God, Kaidan it's me.” Then there's an electrical touch against Kaidan's cheek, it feels like a hand pressing against him.

“Shep?” Kaidan's throat tightens. This can't be happening, but then there's a pair of lips pressing against his own. He opens his eyes frantically but all he can see is the dark brown ceiling. His right eye shows Shepard's figure still though.

“I'm...inbetween.” Shepard chuckles, it vibrates through Kaidan's own body, “It's complicated. I can't really leave, but I can stay here with you.”

Kaidan opens his mouth but then there's another kiss, and another; it's weird, it's _very_ weird. But it's something he's been desperate for since the final battle. He kisses back and feels a heavy weight on his body, he closes his eyes so he won't see the air above him.

“I'm here for you Kaidan. I always will be.” Shepard whispers with a smile.

 

Some of the others don't believe him, think he's lost it.

Ashley spends a lot of time with him, and only realizes that he's telling her the truth when Shepard _somehow_ enters her optic-tech. She cries a lot that day, and hugs Kaidan, and they both feel heavy arms wrapped around them.

They talk, they laugh, and word gets around.

Kaidan still misses Shepard's body sometimes, misses seeing the man and touching him physically. But even this small piece, this consciousness that floats within him, is good.

 

 


End file.
